At the movies… Fifty Shades Darker

Evening,

It has been a long time since I’ve made a post with this tag and it has been because I still can’t find Fallen in my language and I refuse to see the new Zoey Deusch movie (<– no idea why), but now I’m here to review a film adaptation I was excited for since 2015, I’m talking about Fifty Shades Darker by British author E. L. James. This time I went alone, yeah since my friends were busy with their English classes and full time jobs besides I have no boyfriend so… Yeah, I did bought my ticket and watch it just three days ago desperate to remember some things because it has been also a long time back in 2013 when I read the trilogy for the very first time.

So the movie was everything a teenager wants of life and of course this charismatic blogger as well: a hot boyfriend pinning for one self, the dream job to work at an editorial and throwing champagne to an old bitter troll. I was glad they included a bit more realism to fifty-shades-darker-02-99c84418-8f36-418c-9519-d620b54aaf10 the story like Ana’s reaction towards Christian’s stupid idea of bringing her to Mrs Robinson’s work place or how fucked Leila truly is inside that little submissive mind of hers; but of course this wouldn’t had been Fifty Shades if it weren’t for the unrealistic fast passes events like the helicopter crash and the on going desperate but more mature romance. Though I still wish we had had more sex scenes showing Jamie Dornan’s ass or Marcia Gay Harden calling Mrs Robinson a bitch, or perhaps more Mia (yeah she was hilarious though I still miss the time when Ana was the funny drunk), and why not? More screen time for PLL’s Noel Kahn cuz I don’t recall seeing him at all.

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No need to say I still liked the soundtrack specially when Halsey played during that folded eyes sex scene! And the whole cliffhanger with shitty Jack Hyde watching the fireworks as well as the picture of the Grey family. This was such a good adaptation, perhaps a little rushed but it was fine and entertaining as always so definitely can’t wait for #FSF next year! I give this a 4.8 stars out of 5.

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At the movies… Nerve

Hi! It has been almost a year since I went to see a film adaptation of a written work so I might be a little dusty on this. Anyways, this’ll have tons of SPOILERS but as I already gave my review on the book yesterday I don’t think it’ll have much impact on anyone who’s reading this.

Without further ado, here it goes my honest (maybe too honest and mean) opinion.

Overall, the movie adaptation was in only one word a disaster from the beginning to end. It had no redeeming moment, that’s what happens when Hollywood takes an intense stand alone and makes it one of its own cheesy non character driven shit. Yeah, that’s the word I used while watching it all.

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Here are the reasons why, first of all. I would have bought the movie like an original one if the acting hadn’t been so fake and amateur like. I mean I love Emma Roberts but the moment I heard her scream of “excitement” when riding the motorcycle with Ian. Even I could have done it better, and my acting is the worst you have never seen. And don’t let me start commenting on Dave Franco. Please, don’t make me. Just don’t.

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Then was Sidney. Yeah, her movie version deserves an entire paragraph to talk about what the hell she was about. The character was destroyed, this girl wasn’t the perfect (literally) drama club lead but a bitchy cheerleader. Then she wasn’t against Nerve, she had played it already and that earned her that ridiculous fire jacket she seemed to wear in every scene. And she was clearly jealous of Vee and her acting was just not right. The writing of the nicest character was torn apart like cheese for an enchilada in Taco Bell.

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And of course how can I dare to forget about the most stupid challenges this adaptation offered, there was none of the books. The truly terrifying ones the written work gave us were forgotten and fucked by the film studio for what?! So Emma Roberts and Dave Franco could have their underwear laughable moment after having a challenge of trying on some expensive clothes. Yeah, you heard that. Trying on clothes was the fucking “dare”.

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In the most awful finale, the movie gave us Tommy being a sweetheart who ends up with Vee and the world is no longer controlled by the game. Such a Disney ending. No cliffhangers, no traitors, no nothing to redeem this movie for. This was just shit, making one of the most hatred characters a friend of Ian, and forgetting about Mikki. That’s just cruel.

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The script writers, the studio, the director had one simple task. To make this a fresh adaptation but no, they decided to make a desperate remake of “let’s have fun risking our lives since we’re one layer characters”. They succeed in making me hate something which trailer actually got me interested in the book itself. This was such a cheap disappointment. It could have been good but all the wrongs were too many.

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I obviously give this no stars. Such a bad adaptation, it’s definitely not worthy of seeing wether you read the book or not. It’s just your typical High School movie that copy a fantastic concept and managed to screw it in big proportions.